MommyBlog

The Potty Training Answer Book: Practical Answers to the Top 200 Questions Parents Ask,by Karen Deerwester, Pubished by SourceBooks, Inc.

When I was approached with the request to review a new book on potty training, I jumped at the chance… after all, as a mom in the throes of the elusive dry-bottomed-kid, I figured that I could use all the help I could get.   And to date, the only advice on potty training that has actually sounded like it might really work comes from John Rosemond’s book Parenting Power.   In his chapter on potty training, he advises only one technique: “Naked and $75.”   This entails picking a day and letting your precious wiggler run around sans clothing until he realizes that he really hates the sensation of pee pee running down his legs and decides to use the potty instead.   The 75 bucks is for professional carpet cleaning.

Now I was all set to put that one into action, but Kenny has been using the potty at least once (or twice) a day since May.     So he knows what to do and how to do it, the trick has just been my own consistency coupled with his resistance in stopping play in order to do his business.  

Here’s where The Potty Training Answer Bookcame in for us.   The book struck an immediate chord with my own lack of discipline.   But I am getting ahead of myself, and after all, this is not about me; this is a review, for goodness sakes.

Though I read the entire book in one sitting, my only complaint with this publication is its somewhat stilted style.   While it is purposely  presented as  a series of sessions  in  question and answer format, I found that when the the author actually set aside paragraphs outside that format to discuss specific issues or personality traits of children, I was thrown off and had to go back to see whether or not she was answering a question.

That being said, author Karen Deerwester, who, among other accomplishments, is the parent expert for www.bluesuitmom.com, really tackles the meat of the whole potty-training process: That  potty training is one of the foundations of the intimate relationship between a parent and a child.   It’s about building trust, confidence and security, and it requires consistency, patience and lots and lots of humor!

Deerwester suggests that each parent make a study of their child’s personality, and with their unique characteristics in mind, come up with a “personal potty plan” for that child.   Some kids will conquer the whole thing in a weekend, and some will take it slow and steady over a long term process.   Lest this be dismissed as double-speak for child-centered parenting (which I am much opposed to), let me state that Deerwester makes it clear that the parent is in charge of the whole process.   It is merely by taking your own child’s learning strengths into consideration that you can best decide how to make the process as smooth as possible.   She also points out the importance of making sure that every person in the family (including grandparents or others who may babysit or take care of the child) be on the same team.   That is, agree to the strategy and stick to it.

All in all, The Potty Training Answer Book is full of sound advice and I considered it very useful in charting my own plan of attack.   Kenny thinks it’s working, too!

Kenny asked me to write this one for him, as he has still not learned to type…

It’s not easy being Two.

When you’re having fun doing stuff, people tell you, “It’s time to go!” and when you say you don’t want to, they pick you up and carry you away anyway.   And when you’re in the yard with a wiffle ball and throw it as hard as you can, they clap and say, “Good throw, Kenny!” but when you throw  the little pumpkin Mommy gave you to play with  in the middle of dinner and it knocks over Mommy’s wine glass, they say silly things like, “No throwing!”   And why do Mommy and Daddy let me color all over the papers, and say, “Wow, Kenny, that’s beautiful!” but when I color on the carpet, they take my crayons away and say, “Kenny!   what are you doing?”   It’s confusing, being Two.

I love M&Ms.   My Mommy calls them “potty treats” and only gives them to me two at a time, whenever I pee pee or poop in the potty.   Sometimes I only pee a little, get my M&Ms and then go pee the rest and get more.   Mommy gives me a funny look and says, “Next time I want you to pee pee it all out the first time.”   Like, duh.   Then I don’t get as many potty treats.     It’s fun, being Two.

I love my dog Dudley.   He gets to poop outside.   I did that once, when my mom was too slow getting a diaper back on me, and she laughed, but then tried to look serious and said, “Kenny, you have to poop in the potty.   Only Dudley gets to poop outside.”   That’s not fair.   Dudley has a funny tail.   It wiggles when he’s happy.     I wish I had one.   I like to share my food with Dudley.   Especially when I’m all done with lunch and Mommy says I have to eat one more bite.   I can give it to Dudley and she thinks I ate it all up!   But sometimes she sees it and yells at Dudley, and I feel bad, and then she makes me another sandwich and I have to pretend to eat that one, too.   It’s exhausting, being Two.

Kenny.

We bought Kenny a “big boy bed” several weeks ago, and after much ado, it finally arrived today!   It arrived minutes before nap-time, and though I had garnered every possible necessity in order to allow him to sleep in it from moment one, wouldn’t you know that I neglected to get anything to go between the mattress and the bed itself.   Duh.   I knew I didn’t want a box spring yet, but I hadn’t figured that without one, the mattress would sink right through the bed frame slats.  

So after much cajoling, we convinced Kenny to sleep in his crib “one more time” and I ran out to buy a “bunkie board”, load it in the car, and race it home by the time he woke up.   The moment he awoke, we put the bed together safely, bed rails on the side and all, and he was one happy kid.   He bounced on it, rolled on it and generally hugged it for close to an hour.   “MY BASE BALL BIG BOY BED!” he shouted, bouncing for emphasis.

I’ll have to post a picture of it when I remember… it’s the coolest boy bed I’ve ever seen – the headboard and footboard are made of wooden baseball bats.   I splurged and bought the Pottery Barn Kids “Junior Varsity” comforter, and found some boyish light blue sheets to match at Target.   All of the sudden, it’s a dream bed for a kid.

I wasn’t sure if we’d need a few nights to “transition” from the crib to the bed, so we didn’t take the crib apart today.   I guess with all the travel this little wanderer has experienced, and all the cribs, beds, pack-n-plays and whatnot he’s slept in around the US (and England) he was pretty confident jumping right into the bed this evening and snuggling in.   I read him his books in bed tonight, instead of in our regular chair, then we nestled together under the covers for prayers.   After two, Kenny said, “You go sleep in your bed, Mama.” and rolled over.   He was nearly asleep before I turned out the light.

Victory!!

The other victory is one that we’ve been working on for a month or two.   Kenny finally pooped in his potty.   He’s been peeing in it, albeit inconsistently, since we bought it in June, but has firmly refused to do the Two.   But tonight he started doing it by accident while he was peeing (he’s still tinkling sitting down), and after some sweet insistence and encouragement on my part, he sat there for fifteen minutes, reading his little potty book, until, in his words, “All done!   Poops all out!”

Victory, times two.

Goodnight Gorilla, by Peggy Rathmann

Kenny discovered this unusual and captivating book a few weeks ago when we were vacationing in the Outer Banks.   It must have been left by a family before us, and I hope that they, whomever they are, were crushed to find it missing and have already  bought another copy by now, because this one is a keeper!

When we first began reading it, I thought, “Hm… the text here is a little … um… slim.”   But as big fans of the Carl books by Alexandra Day, we pressed on, filling out the story as we turned the pages.   And we are so glad that we did!   For the last three weeks, this has been Kenny’s “one last book” before both naps and bedtime, sometimes even twice in a row.   Only now it takes us fifteen minutes to read, because we’ve filled in so much “story” to the incredibly detailed and intelligently humorous illustrations.  

The story is just the sort of thing to excite a  budding imagination: As a night watchman checks to see that all the animals in the zoo are safely locked in for the night, a mischievous gorilla steals his keys, and lets all of the animals out behind them.   They end up following the night watchman home, and into his room.   I won’t tell anymore, because I hope you all go out and buy this  book for your own little ones!  

Kenny’s favorite thing about the book, this week anyway, is the discovery that on every page in the book, there is a purple balloon slowly floating away.   A mouse lets go of it on the first page, and Kenny delights in following it’s progress as we read through the story.   This is one of those unique children’s books that sparks conversations, yes, even with a two-year-old, everytime you read them.   We’ve talked about what all the animals do, how they sound, what they eat and why they sneak out to follow the night watchman home.   We’ve noticed that all the animals have stuffed animals in their cages to sleep with, and that the mouse really likes bananas.

If Kenny were writing this review, he would say, “Read it again!”

Casey is home, after only sixteen hours in the hospital.   He is watching Monday night football and eating a mountain of pasta and meatballs.   Thank goodness no overnight stay at the hospital!

He did not actually have the surgery we had planned for today, and  that was a possibility we were prepared for.   Without getting too detailed, when the cardiologist inserted the catheter into Casey’s heart, they were unable to pinpoint  the exact problem spot  they were looking for.       We will be following up with the cardiologist as he works to find an alternative diagnosis.   So all in all, we have ruled out what it’s not, and are still searching to find what it is.   He was in surgery for two and a half hours all told, and ended up being quite heavily sedated, which we were not expecting.     It was mildly entertaining, though, talking to him afterwards…

Thanks to all who sent emails and well-wishes.   I felt your prayers during those long hours in the waiting room.

Casey’s surgery is rescheduled for tomorrow morning.   We have to leave the house at 4:30 AM (yikes!), and won’t know until we get there what time he’ll actually go under.   My parents are staying over tonight to be with Kenny all day tomorrow, and possibly into tomorrow night.

I’m not the complete bundle of nerves that I was the first two times the surgery was scheduled, but that could possibly be because of the three glasses of wine and giant ice cream sundae that I’ve consumed this evening.   Hey.   Whatever works.

I don’t know when I’ll have a chance to write in the next two days, but please keep us in your thoughts and prayers!

We took Kenny to his first USNA football game today (46 – 43 win over Duke!).   We had been invited as guests up to a friend’s suite, and as there were lots of families with kids, Kenny was pretty happy to roam around and meet and greet everyone who would talk to him.  

But before the first quarter was up, he settled himself in the front row corner of the box with a group of 7 and 8 year old girls who fawned over him for over an hour.   Kenny would roar in their faces like a lion, each one in turn, and they would shriek in mock-horror, then swoop him into a bear hug.   Then on to the next girl.  

At one point Casey looked at me and said, “Should we be worried that he’s over there kissing girls?”

Nah.

The Newly Non-Drinking Girl’s Guide to Pregnancy: Advice and Support for surviving 40 weeks without a cosmopolitan, by Jackie Rose and Caroline Angel RN, Phd.   Published by Sourcebooks, Inc. 2007

“From Drinking for one to eating for two…” is how this often hilarious, occasionally serious book begins.   If you’re like me, you enjoy a glass of wine with dinner, or a martini when you’ve escaped on an elusive date with that guy you share a last name with.   And if you’re like me, one of the first things you thought of when you found out you were pregnant was, “Does this mean I really can’t have any wine with dinner tonight?”   And not only that, but when you’re in the throes of raging hormones and feeling fatter than a jersey cow, and the thing you want more than anything is a little something to take the edge off, the mere reality of the fact that your husband is popping open a cold one in your presence is enough for you to clobber him over the head with a nursing bra.

The Newly Non-Drinking Girl’s Guide to Pregnancy takes the humorous approach to just about everything alcohol-related you may encounter in your nine months of abstinence.   From sneaky “mocktails” that look like the real thing (to hold in hand while out and about with folks who don’t yet know you’ve got a bun in the oven, and to whom your lack of drinking would fire up the red flag) to “fetus-friendly buzzes” you can get without the proof, its’ a fun, easy read sure to occupy one of those nights in your forty weeks where you just need to soak in the tub with a fun book.

On the serious side, there are many statistics and facts throughout the book that highlight the very real dangers of imbibing once you know you are pregnant.   For instance, the authors site research by the March of Dimes that states that Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is the leading known cause of mental retardation, affecting more than 10,000 babies born each year in the US.   It is “…more prevalent than spina bifida, Down syndrome, muscular dystrophy and HIV combined.”   Not only that, but even light drinking during pregnancy has been linked to over 40,000 babies born each year in what is called the Fetal Alcohol Spectrum – those with mild developmental, cognitive and behavioral issues.

If that’s not enough to make you pour out your toddy, I don’t know what is.

All in all, The Newly Non-Drinking Girl’s Guide to Pregnancy, with fifty mocktail recipes and both helpful and funny ideas for surviving your forty weeks, is a great book to  peruse when you’re expecting, or to give as a baby shower gift.   My only gripe with the book  is that it  often  makes the  assumption that all  of “us girls” out there are out-and-out lushes when not swathed in fashions from Motherhood Maternity.    That  presumption  can  be annoying at times, but it’s a forgivable offense when the book as a whole is so enjoyable.

Pickles and tonic, anyone?

Here at MommyBlog headquarters (aka, the  desk I share with my husband), I am often asked to read and review books and post the reviews on my website.   I haven’t done too many so far, mostly dur to moving back and forth across country, and to a certain small boy who did not start taking naps until he was 14 months old.     Ah, but he’s consistantly napping (for now!) and I have resolved to no longer devote all his naptimes to my obsessive house cleaning, and instead to devote at least two naptimes a week to other productive activities.   A hobby, if you will.   So I finally have the time to both read more and write more!

The last book I received for  a review was  the chuckle-worthy, yet “soberingly” informative, The Newly Non-Drinking Girls Guide to Pregnancy, byt Jackie Rose and Caroline Angel RN, PhD.   I was all set to post my review (and segue into announcing I was pregnant)  the week I had my second miscarriage.   I just couldn’t bring myself to post it then.   So it will follow this post,  much delayed, and with my apologies to the authors.

In that vein, I intend to start posting Book reviews every Wednesday.   I have a small stack of them waiting, which I have  already received, and I hope to hear from you writers out there with more requests.   Please contact me via this website and submit your information and I will contact you about the details.   I will also offer my thoughts on books whose authors have not asked for my review or opinion.   Just to have some fun.

I love to read – I can usually consume a novel a week, plus periodicals and Bible reading  – and I often end a good yarn wishing I could talk about it with someone.   I am not a member of a book club, mostly because I haven’t found one, and I don’t necessarily want to read a book over the course of 5 or 6 weeks just to discuss it.     But I do love the idea of reviewing books!     So here is a new challenge I hope I can stick to.

Dudley is entering day 24 with a cone on his head.   What should have been a torturous 10 days has turned into over three weeks.  

For a dog that lives to run, walk and curl up into small spaces, this is the ultimate imprisonment.   And last night, we hit a new low for him when we finally left him downstairs to sleep by himself, instead of bringing him up to our room, as he’s done every night since we’ve had him.   It’s that horrid cone, for goodness sakes, that makes these ear-splitting sounds everytime he scratches, shakes his head or tries to lick his privates.   That, and in the dark he kept getting himself stuck between the wall and the bed, and requiring one of us (Casey) to get up and free him.   During the day, we can’t let him out without a leash, and inside he continually gets stuck on furniture, and knocks us over with the cone when he swings his head.   Kenny has begun to avoid him altogether, and when Dudley does advance for a pet, Kenny cries out, “No Dudley!” as our little guy has gotten stuck in the cone with Dudley’s head more than once.  

We are taking him to the vet tomorrow for what we hope (oh, please!) will be the removal of his wretched stitches.   We expect he’ll still need the cone a little (as the scabs are still there and begging to be licked) but at least then we’d know we were on the road to freedom.

Poor Dudley.   He is so depressed he can hardly bring himself to scamper into the kitchen when he sees me with a cookie, much less motivate himself to do anything but lie on the sofa and sigh.   Even his perky ears are a picture of doom.

Keep your fingers crossed for us tomorrow!   Get well, Dudley!!!!